I am asking you to love me. Completely. Wholly. Despite all my flaws and my imperfection. Despite my fickle temperament and lightning-fast bipolar mood swings. I’m asking you to love me as I am. As ill-tempered, strong-willed, emotional, weird, and gullible as I am. I am asking you to love me. Like no one else can. Because you have seen me at my best, you have held me at my worst, and you have calmed me in my rage. You understand me best even when I didn’t understand myself. You lift me up when I am down. You treasure me when I am a wreck. You handle me delicately when I am fragile. And you take care of me when I am broken. I am asking you to love me when no one else will and no one else can. Because I will love you the same way, probably even more. So please, love me.
Eyes open to all that’s happening. Every touch means something. Every whisper is a story. Every giggle is a stimuli.
Suddenly, everything made sense. You’re no better than I am. You’re just good at hiding it.
You’re my “permanently stupid” even if I’m not “temporarily” upset… Thing… You aren’t a mistake, just a thing… An experience of sorts.
I don’t believe in forever. So, instead, I’ll say that I’ll love you for the rest of my life. And it will be true, no matter what. Because even if we are not meant to be together, you will always be a part of my heart and my memories. And I will always love you with a little piece of my heart.
I want to be a love so deep, so passionate, that it becomes unparalleled. I want to be the greatest love, that everyone else pales in comparison. I want you to love me like no one else can and no one else will, and I will love you too.
I want you to hold me close, to hold me tight, that our bodies are undefined by boundaries. I want to be held in your arms, secure in the thought that we are happy with each other.
I want passionate fights and arguments and equally passionate make up sex. I want our love to be so hot that it burns like the brightest star, like our sun.
I want our love to be so bright that even the dead of the night lights up. I want fireflies attracted to our love like moths to a flame.
I want our love to shout and proclaim itself in its quiet contemplation. I want our love to be as calm as a raging waterfall, full of life and sounds. I want it to be sweet and charming. I want it to be cool and calming. I want it to be hot and scalding.
I want it to be contradictory yet complementary. I want a perfectly imperfect love that is only ours to share, to be witnessed by all. An enviable love that actually inspires but never ruin. I want that love.
“Travel is like love, mostly because it’s a heightened state of awareness, in which we are mindful, receptive, undimmed by familiarity and ready to be transformed. That is why the best trips, like the best love affairs, never really end.” Pico Iyer
I want to go on a road trip. Nowhere in particular. Just a random drive. Maybe a stopover to watch the sunset and to dance under the moonlight.
Somehow lose myself and the pressures and stresses of my young life even if it’s just for one night.
To just camp in a forest clearing or to lie in a flower field or to laze around just beyond the reach of calm waves on a beach.
To climb a mountain and reach the peak, to watch the rising sun, to relax in the summer heat, to lounge in the cool of the night.
To be illuminated by the glow of fireflies, to smell the night bloom of an Angel’s Trumpet, to bask in the light of the stars.
Just a random road trip to make me smile again.